 Posted: Fri 20:07, 25 Mar 2011 Post subject: Cinderella - What a Story! |
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| Cinderella - What a Story!
I used to be a rescuer. I would find a damsel in distress and save her. That made me a hero, didn’t it? You’d think so. But, after a little counseling for a broken heart and lost marriage, I could see clearer and got the picture. It seems that the rescue mission is about three beings. (1) The Vanquisher, an evil being who is taking unfair advantage of (2) the Victim who is always innocent and pure, therefore always right, who needs to be saved by (3) The Valiant Knight who must be the rescuer and therefore the Hero. Being the Hero makes him right as well. After years of missing the point, I finally relived my experiences in my mind and realized how I had created these messes for myself. What I now understand is Part II of the rescuer scenario. We imagine that once the rescuer has saved the damsel they go off to live happily ever after. That cannot happen. Because the Victim has chosen not to take responsibility for her life, she must always be a victim and get rescued continually or guess who becomes the Vanquisher in her mind...yup...now Valiant Knight is the one preventing her from being happy. (Ladies look out! Men can be victims and women can be rescuers too. It is not a gender thing at all.) Imagine the hurt feelings in the man’s heart who thought he was a hero, only to find out that he is now the scoundrel because she still expects him to give her the life she will never take the responsibility to create for herself. She will humiliate him until he gives her everything she asks for or until he gives up and leaves. ?In a movie I saw, a fellow who was a friend of a nice lady, asked why he couldn’t win the heart of the girl he cared for. He asked a poignant question: “What do women really want from a man?” Her answer was incredible. “To tell the truth,” she said, “we have no idea." OK people, imagine trying to satisfy the needs of a person who changes what they need depending upon what they don’t have. When will we, as a race, start to think instead of jumping around irrationally looking to satisfy an insatiable mind. Only you can satisfy yourself. No one else can do it for you until you do your part and take full responsibility for your thoughts, actions and the? occurrences in your life. Of course, it is possible to help someone who is not playing victim. This gives them the opportunity to be appreciative and do the responsible things thereafter. This person would not be a victim, but merely someone who had a problem. A problem is simply an unanswered question. You show them how to do it for themselves. At the end of my first marriage to my first damsel in distress, I planned a bankruptcy to regroup and create a new life, one that I would be in charge of; one that I would take full responsibility for. The circumstances looked impossible, so I was willing to take the consequences of the mistakes I made and allowed to be made. Being willing is a wonderful step toward changing one's life circumstances.? When I told my father what I was planning, he made another suggestion. He offered me a job with his company. He said he would absorb my losses, which would help his tax circumstances and I could pay him back from the profit on the sales I would make for him. The Universe is amazing! Three months later he was paid in full and didn't have any of my losses to report to the IRS. What had appeared as an impossible amount of money to ever pay back was cleared up in a few months. His willingness and my willingness had come together and created a true win-win for both of us and my new life was built on solid ground. Let's talk a little more about Cinderella. In 1997 the lovely and charming Princess Diana died tragically in an auto accident. I watched in awe at the response. It was as if the heart of every girl/woman died. The true fairy tale princess didn't live happily ever after. Weeks and months passed and the story made front page. It was like an unusual, even impossible event had occurred. Jim Croce had died in a motorcycle accident. Harry Chapin died in the back seat of a limousine. Jayne Mansfield was beheaded in a convertible that flipped. What made Princess Diana different? A week after Princess Di's death, Mother Theresa died. Mother Theresa was a saintly woman who lived in poverty and gave her life to those who were less fortunate. Her death barely made the news. Simply spoken, women, since childhood, were raised with a desire to be a princess, not a real woman. What kind of values do we live by? Since when does glamor and opulence outweigh love and kindness? Yes, Princess Diana was more than a glamor girl. She was an especially good woman. I'm not taking from her, only pointing out the attitude of women toward the fairy tale. These attitudes do not reflect real life values. OK then, let's bring in another culprit, the addictive nature of people. Because of my studies, values and belief systems, when I have free time I write about metaphysics, sketch, play my guitar and otherwise attempt to create something beautiful. These are actually my addictions. The way I say it is this: "Whenever a person has a moment of silence, wherever they run first, that is their addiction." Many people aren't satisfied with only one addiction. they have a list of addictions. In this way, they never have to be alone quietly?with themselves nor do they have to think. Watch a person driving in the car on the cell phone. It usually isn't a necessary call. It is just easier to talk than to quietly think or observe. A person home alone is likely to pour a drink or light up a smoke or do drugs than to meditate, write, read a book or redesign their life. What is the purpose of these observations? It appears that most people will go to any length not to be still, be in the moment, be grateful,Burberry Scarves, be forgiving or any of the character building possibilities. They will go to any length in order not to have to really think. I present you with a simple example: You are standing in a crowd and feel someone looking at you. You turn around and see a familiar face. You realize that you actually felt a thought from someone else. What does it do for you? It gives you the opportunity to say “Oh, it must be ESP,” put it in a box and file it away without any thought about the implications. Oh what effort we make not to think! We have just proven that life is something that goes beyond the five physical senses, that we are more than just bodies, that we are not limited by the material view of things, that we can touch others without use of physical limbs, that we are not our brain, but rather it is our tool, not who we are. Deepak Chopra gave this example: Pause and point at yourself. Stop here and do this now. Why did you point at your heart and not your head? You are pointing at the place where your soul intersects with your being, not your computer. You really know that you are so much more. We don't need to be afraid to be our real selves. Who we are is beautiful--when we give up the pursuit of fairy tales, stay in the present and live the life we were sent here to live. Look what we are willing to do to ourselves to avoid thinking, meditating and learning about a higher life here and now! We will all leave this life. We will not bring our cars, homes or any material possessions. What we will bring is who we are. I have spoken to enough people who have had near-death light experiences to know that there is “something” after we leave this life. If all we can bring is who we are, what will that be for you. If money is your life’s goal, you will be there with no skills. If your addictions define your life, what will life be like without them? There really doesn’t have to be a heaven or hell when we die. If we are angry, resentful and materialistic and have no way of living out these fantasies, we will be in hell. If we are loving, aware, willing to grow spiritually and blissful when we arrive, we will be in heaven. Choose wisely between the fairy tale and enlightenment. |
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