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The mainstream approach to addiction recovery consists of two primary components, neither of which yields better than a 5-7% success ratio, nor do they address self-esteem related issues.
If you’re like most, you may not realize that 98% of all addiction treatment options utilize Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and/or the Twelve-Step Program as their primary modalities. Ironically, both of these approaches fail to properly address low levels of self-esteem. Instead, they offer counterproductive principles of stoicism and powerlessness which further exacerbates the situation.
At this point, you may be asking what a low level of self-esteem has to do with addiction. Well, the answer is everything! You see, the root cause of addiction is the emotional trauma caused by family dysfunction. These patterns of control, abuse, and part-time parenting rob a person of their personal power and undermine self-esteem. And, it’s no secret that individuals suffering from addiction not only have a low level of self-esteem, but they also live in a world of self-blame and shame. I like to call this condition “Wounditis!” Commonly, they blame themselves for their family’s dysfunctional behavior.
As an example, “My Mother verbally abused me by constantly telling me I was worthless, stupid, and ugly, but she’s right, I am!” Or, “My Father bludgeoned me with a hockey stick on a regular basis and broke my bones, but I was a bad kid and deserved it!” This type of self-blame destroys ones self-esteem and drives addictive behavior. Obviously, the two individuals mentioned above don’t love themselves, and they view themselves as being flawed and worthless, which by the way is absolutely untrue and ridiculous!
However, the more someone tells you that you are worthless, the more you begin to believe them! Let’s face it! If you really loved yourself and were brimming with self-esteem, would you be drinking destructively or abusing drugs? Therefore, if you want to overcome your addiction, you’re going to have to seek the truth through liberation and restore your self-esteem through empowerment.
For your benefit, I have outlined the four stages of self-esteem below. Notice that liberation is the first. This is not by chance since the remaining stages are difficult, if not impossible, to reach if you do not obtain the first.
1. Liberation
To set somebody free from traditional socially imposed constraints.
If you are in fact suffering from addictive behavior, begin by examining the path that brought you to your present state. What types of family dysfunctions played a role in undermining your self-esteem? Were your parents verbally, physically, or sexually abusive? Were they controlling and manipulative? Did the fail to provide the love, guidance, and bonding by showing up part-time for a full-time job? Or, did they themselves abuse alcohol or drugs? These are the questions that must be answered. Once you have uncovered these negative patterns, you must liberate yourself from them by putting a stop to the dysfunctional behavior. This must be done by either setting some boundaries, or in extreme cases severing the relationship.
2. Self-reflection
A complete and individual personality, especially one that somebody recognizes as his or her own and with which there is a sense of ease.
Once you have liberated yourself from patterns of dysfunction, it is time to re-evaluate who you are, what you believe in, and the principles you stand for. It is hard to be at ease with yourself, if you fail to live your life in truth or stand for a set of principles. Define what those are and stand like a rock, refusing to let anyone persuade you otherwise.
3. Self-love
To hold ones self in hi merit or regard, concerning their personality, principles, and actions.
Once you have adopted a new set of principles and beliefs, you can now begin to uncover who you really are. Get to know yourself! Discover your true authentic self, and realize that you have the power to change and create anything you want in life. We are all the same and we are all connected. So, the playing field is a level plane! Note: (Mediation can be helpful in this process.)
4. Transformation
A complete change - usually into something with an improved state, appearance, or usefulness.
Change is incredibly hard and very frightening for most people, isn’t it! The fact of the matter is, most people avoid and even resist change. But, you can’t avoid it, and you certainly can’t stop it.
At the end of the day, life is a journey of change. And the sooner you realize that the better off you’ll be. Let’s use the following parable to describe the process of change; your standing on the dysfunctional side of the road and on the other side is change.
You can stay on the dysfunctional side of the road and say “even though this side is pretty screwed up, it’s a little more comfortable than the other side because I don’t know what’s over there!” Or you can venture into the middle of the road, confused about whether to go back or to cross.” And, I don’t think I need to tell what happens when you stand in the middle of the road to long,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], do I! Or, you can close your eyes and walk across in faith, knowing that what ever is on the other side has to be better than where you were! But, this is scary for people isn’t it? In reality, it just comes down to fear! You really do have “nothing to fear but fear itself!”
For more information on how to overcome your addiction subscribe to my free e-guide below………
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Regards,
David Roppo
The Addiction Freedom Coach

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Philosopher Herbert Spencer regarded play as the means of reducing surplus energy – energy that is burned up in play that has no productive purpose. Biologist Karl Groos argued that pay was preparation for life. He observed young animals at play – a kitten stalks a ball of yarn like a tiger will eventually stalk its prey. Likewise, children play house in preparation for assuming adult roles later in life.
May I encourage all of us to value childhood with its own special joys, sorrows,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], worries and rewards. Valuing childhood,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], however, doesn’t mean seeing it as a happy innocent period but rather as an important period of life to which children are entitled.
The French philosopher Jean-Jacque Rousseau wrote,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], “Childhood has its own way of seeing, thinking, and feeling, and nothing is more foolish than to try to substitute ours for theirs.”
It’s clinicians who deal with hurried children in that many of them experience school failure, abuse drugs and alcohol, and commit suicide. They have chronic psychosomatic complaints such as headaches and stomachaches and depression, which are the symptoms recognized as stress related in adults. Children pushed to grow up fast suddenly find that many adults activities – which they assumed would be their privilege – such as smoking,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], drinking, driving and so on, are denied them until they reach a certain age. They feel betrayed by a society that tells them to grow up fast but also to remain a child. Growing up emotionally is complicated and difficult under any circumstance but may be especially so when children’s behavior and appearance speak “adult” while their feelings cry out “child.”
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The best evidence of the hurried child is the lack of opportunities for genuine unstructured play – the kind where children use their imaginations, make and break rules, and socialize with each other. In the past two decades,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], children have lost 12 hours of free time a week, and eight of those lost hours were once spent in unstructured play and outdoor pastimes. And we’ll talk technology in a minute, but first let’s look at how the way we view play has changed over the years.
I highly recommend working parents enjoy the time they spend with their children. I tell them don’t spoil it for them by worrying about the time you were not around or about the times you will be separated in the future. Children live in the present, and they know when we are with them physically but not mentally. By worrying about the past and future, we lose the present and our children don’t have us, even when we are around.
The pressure on today’s children to grow up fast begins in early childhood, starting with their clothing. We dress our children in miniature adult costumes (cough, Little League), we expose them to gratuitous sex and violence, and we expect them to cope with an increasing bewildering social environment – divorce, single parenthood, sexuality, etc.
If you only remember one thing, remember this. Adults tend to assume that children are much more like us in their thoughts than they are in their feelings. But in fact, just the reverse is true: CHILDREN ARE MOST LIKE US IN THEIR FEELINGS AND LEAST LIKE US IN THEIR THOUGHTS.
Here’s another important recommendation. Use play as the antidote to hurrying,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and if you need a simple checklist, there is a book called 201 Things to Do When Children Say I’M BORED! The Checklist and Journal for Busy Families. (www.201thingstodo.com)
For all these reasons and more, it important parents reach out and connect with their children. Children very much want and need the love, support and guidance of their parents. Even hurried children and digital adolescents need to be hugged.
A working mother, for example,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], offers her child a rational explanation, “I have to work so we can eat, buy clothes and so on.” Instead,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], she might say, “I’m really going to miss you today and wish you could be with me.” By responding to the child’s feelings, she lessens some of the stress of hurrying.
Finally, Maria Montessori developed a simple formula that has since become a widely accepted cliche: Play is the child’s work. Sadly, there are far too many adults who feel that every spur-of-the-moment interest of a child is an opportunity for a lesson. Hurried children work more than they play, and perhaps this is the reason they are so stressed.
Unfortunately, play has been transformed into work in our hurried society. What was once recreational – sports, summer camps, musical training – is now professionalized and competitive.
In the 40’s and 50’s, many parents were afraid of repressing their children and making them neurotic through too much discipline. As a result,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], children were free to express themselves, free to indulge in their most primitive impulses and, in a word, became “spoiled.” It is scary to a child to have power over adults. Children, when handed a power they did not want, did not need, and could not handle, become willful and domineering.
By Jodie Randisi
See all Articles by Jodie RandisiSee Jodie Randisi's Expert PageGet Updates on Child DevelopmentGet Updates on Jodie Randisi Average: 0 Your rating: None Tweet
Unlike the spoiled children who remain children too long, hurried children grow up too fast, pushed in their early years toward many types of achievement and exposed to experiences that tax their adaptive capacity.
The result is a hurried child. I know all of us can instantly recognize a spoil child, but can we identify a soiled child, in other words, a hurried child?
Although there are many camps that offer swimming,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], sailing, horseback riding, archery and campfires for fun,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], there are many more camps that offer specialized training in foreign languages, tennis, basketball, dance and computers, lacrosse, gymnastics, and time at these camps is not to be frittered away by engaging in activities created merely for fun. It is to be used to perfect skills and abilities.
Now let’s talk about digital children. Harvard author and professor Robert Putnam explains fifty years of growing isolation as the product of mass penetration of TV sets into households followed by new technologies. We’ve become an age-segregated society wherein kids are with other kids in some kind of organized activity or they’re by themselves preoccupied with cell phones and Facebook. Often parents don’t know who their kids are talking to or what they’re talking about. Grandparents are rarely in the picture. Older people live in retirement communities apart from families, which is why families don’t share moments let alone make memories with young people. When children have immediate access to friends through instant messaging, it no wonder the divide between children and their parents gets wider.
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Until you make time to explore what you really want and engage your heart also, the likelihood of being inspired to learn how to retrain your brain in the first place is diminished. Think a new thought today. Recognizing the need for personal growth doesn’t mean you are defective or broken; it just means you are wise and willing to grow. You have the foresight to lead those around you into understanding that it is time to let go of our limited mindset that equates growth and change as something to be ashamed of or feared. As Marshall Goldsmith said, ‘What got you here, won’t get you there’.
Let me be clear; courage is not the same as intimidation. Intimidation, the bully-boss, and the poorly communicative culture are a result of lack of courage of those in leadership. I say have compassion for yourself if you feel overwhelmed by the rapid change and just know that contrary to popular myth, having a high IQ doesn’t mean you know everything.
Yet,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], even in the face of validation from science about the power and reality of these very powerful human attributes to engage people, many leaders still aggressively or passive-aggressively oppose embracing the conversation for EQ and personal development. Why? Lack of courage. It takes courage to embrace change and have tough conversations.
We have more insight about our brain than we’ve had in recorded human history, and it would be courageous of you as a leader to start paying attention to how you can begin to retrain your brain to change your perception about compassion, vulnerability, and empathy. Intuition is an ingredient for real innovation. Disrespecting it because it’s traditionally been that way is to keep living your past in the present – even when it no longer works.
Vulnerability requires less fear,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], courage. Empathy requires presence and connection – something people are craving. Some traditions need to pass away; it’s called evolution. Where should you begin?
Most people are living a nightmare. And,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], apparently,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the worse part of it begins as they wake up in the morning and head to work. Supposedly, the highest rate of heart attacks happen at 9:00am on Monday mornings. In case you are wondering why,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], that is the first day back to work. Activity is at an all time high. Productivity apparently is dropping if 80% of the workforce is disengaged. What are we afraid of? Why must human beings keep acting with insanity, as Einstein is to have defined it, ‘Doing the same things over and over and expecting different results’.
By Valencia Ray, MD
See all Articles by Valencia Ray See Valencia Ray 's Expert PageGet Updates on LeadershipGet Updates on Valencia Ray Average: 2 Your rating: None Average: 2 (1 vote) Tweet
2. What does this look like in your mind’s eye? How will you walk, talk,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], act, and speak? What will you do? Who are you doing it with? How are you feeling about yourself and others, and how are you engaging with others? This is called ‘Mental Rehearsal’. The mind will find clear and compelling visions. Get some fire stirring in your heart. It can move mountains.
Autocratic leadership doesn’t work. Even if you can intimidate people into conformity,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it is such a near-sighted tactic that resources – profits – are impacted by it through low energy, poor attitude, and a caustic work environment. Can’t leaders see that for lack of vision people are ‘perishing’? The old school said that vulnerability meant weakness, compassion was for the wimpy,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and intuition was airy-fairy or ‘a woman’s’.
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Real leadership is about having the courage to inspire change and engage the heart of others to take action. Not just action for the sake of action; there also needs to be clarity of ‘why’ you are choosing a given course of action. What are you as a leader doing that is different than you did two years ago to be more effective? The environment has changed in two years. Have you course corrected? Or is your rational mind stuck in the past? Perhaps your left-brain needs to collaborate with your right-brain to create a new vision in your mind’s eye and heart – then engage to lead others toward it. As the adage goes,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], ‘Vision without actions is a daydream; action without vision is a nightmare’.
Stop derailing yourself and stay on track by taking back the steering wheel of your mind and building your courage, your mind muscle. Be a leader and lead. Retrain your brain.
1. Make — not wait — for extra time and space to reflect on what kind of leader you want to be. What benefit will that bring you, the people around you,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and the greater society? What kind of leader do you admire and would you love to become? Why? Keep digging for a list of benefits while asking ‘why’ at each point. The more meaning you muster up, the more you are on the right track. Reflecting on meaning can give your mind and heart the fuel and lift to break your stuck trajectory.
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I think the guy who devised this rule of thumb is pretty smart and looking smarter every day. He must have lived through some tough times and stock market declines,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], as we are now.
Far too many investors have taken on far too much risk and of course, that only shows during tough economic and market conditions.
So remember that the perfect investment is that which provides the most return AND the most sleep!
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The perfect investment is the investment you can sleep with,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. The perfect investment is that which provides the most return and the most sleep is most likely not the investment providing the highest return,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
I think in the zeal for greater return and an over reliance on so called investment professionals has far too many older investors far too exposed to the stock market.
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A 30 year old should have 30% in fixed income which I am sure would be considered stogy and too conservative but consider that bonds have beat stocks over the last decade and over many five year periods in history,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
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Faith and the power of positive thinking is what has made this work for others and it will work for you too. In order to see that you are probably going to need the stories of genuine people who have been through the same journey of doubt you are now going through. The best possible place to go to get those and a clear idea of how this can work for you is the worlwide gifting,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it will make sure you can see the advantages.
Cash gifting will certainly work for you as it has for hundreds of others. To give it a fair chance though you will need to have a change of attitude and start believing in yourself and others. You will also need to sell this change in lifestyle to your nearest and dearest,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], this should be pretty easy once the cash starts rolling in.
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You may have some trouble at first getting your head around the idea of a career shift that involves giving up a stable job to move into what you consider to be a fairly murky and confusing world. You will no longer rise and pull on your trousers one leg at a time. You will not be normal anymore. Instead you will work on your reputation and presence on the net as someone who gives away money and expects nothing in return. But nothing is far from what you will get. In fact cash will begin rolling into your home,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], if you have a little faith.
If you are in full term employment that you hate or if you are now looking for employment due to the credit crunch,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], there is now an ideal solution. Cash gifting. Any apprehensions you have about this should be blown away by one little thought,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], this idea makes you money while you are sleeping. It is not a joke. Once you have yourself set up with a presence on the internet and you start to get into the spirit of gifting cash,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you will earn money while you sleep.
One of the programs that has been very successful in cash gifting is Magnetic cash gifting,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], this idea is sure to make you money and make regular employment a thing of the past. Making that first Cash gift will change your life.
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By Samuel Price
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How To Get Proffessional Results In Network Marketing
Pros go to work,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], every day; they do it whether or not they feel like it, inspired
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Amateurs only work whne they "feel like it", professionals do it every single day;
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There is one very major difference between amteurs and professionals
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Don't get me wrong. Inspiration is great and very much appreciated. But don't wait for it.
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By dorthywilliams
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Next on the list of types of equity mortgage release scheme is the reversion plan. In case of your enrolment to this type,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you sell a portion of your house to the companies and enjoy an income in accordance with it. When you expire,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the lenders get back their sum by selling the property.
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Equity mortgage release is a plan with which most of the individuals plan to enroll. This is because the amount that the senior citizens are subject to get after retirement through their enrolment into these deals is significant enough to meet their essential needs and requirements. The senior citizens are not really fond of the luxurious materials,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but they are worried about meeting their medical expenses. Equity mortgage release is a plan with the help of which the retirees get a chance to fulfill al their essential requirements. Just having an eligible age and ownership of a well-maintained property makes you eligible for the entitlement to these amounts.
Making an investment is quite a serious affair. But spending money on something that could be helpful for securing your future is a smart investment. When you purchase a house, you might think it to be an irrelevant investment at the initial stage of your profession. But once the loan that you take to purchase the house is covered up, you become the ultimate owner of the property. This,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], in turn, makes you the boss of the house. As a result,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], when you retire,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you are free to take any decision related to your house. Whether you desire to sell it or earn in lieu of it through the facilities of release equity home.
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Core tip: January 23rd,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I attended the three session of the eleven National People's Congress of the province, the provincial people's Congress with the city people's Commission,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], arrived in Fuzhou. Until 23 last night,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], in addition to 1 delegates leave, the remaining 44 delegates have been reported.
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an hour or more.
The first step to changing the high stress road to burnout approach to your work day is to build in “joy breaks” or mini refreshers.
A Broker has taken no fiduciary oath. (“Churn” means excessive trading. but it does become less powerful. the horizon opens up and the wind is at our back making the road ahead much easier. KEEP GOOD NOTES Remember that the power is always on the side of the person who has done the most preparation and has the best notes. and the more cooperation you will gain from others. space,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and distract you from your true priorities.
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She’s going to tell me to believe in myself and visualize my dreams and I’ll get everything I want delivered on a silver platter. deepening process. I'll be an innovator to supply better solution or tap on the existing opportunity.net,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], whether you have the things you want in life or not,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych],2 (9 votes) Tweet 1. and present can affectdirectly or indirectly your outlook in life? the activities you are engaging in,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], In America and in most of the Free World,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], an opportunity ..
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A hell of a lot of all of those things (but you can see the P. How much could be learn? I thought. you can be sure that your subconscious mind is out of synch with your conscious one.

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What invisible wing lends it flight? If we have the wrong perspective—one which is incorrect or incomplete—it takes a lot of time and effort in unthinking all these littler perspectives that make up a big one and replacing them one by one. having genuine peace of mind or leaving a noble legacy for others to admire. This takes time but,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], useful information,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], Commit to flicking this energy zapper off your back so it doesn't weigh you down. failure to exercise and overworking. or are you getting caught in the old “I’ll be happy when…”? healthy and loving who I am.” The answer came to me quickly: I would reveal more about my ideas and goals rather than hold back and wait to be sure I was safe.
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8. Passion is always creative. it can become a reality.
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